Archive for November, 2005

Del.icio.us

November 12, 2005

Yes. its true. For those of you who have heard of it, the buzzword is 'Social Browsing'.

A little about del.icio.us . It's a brilliant service that lets you save your bookmarks and let you continue from where you left off later. Browsing happens in sessions. Rightly said, I think its a brilliant idea. The only problem being, saving a bookmark is not enough. The mind wanders and meanders and different ideas catch its fancy at different times. If it was possible to save ones memory and resume from where they left off?

All in all, I'm a social browser. This would have something to do with delicacies round the city. Ahhhh, beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. I must say i did enjoy being amongst 500 others @home, but being 1 in 10,000 is quite something else. Sure its a much wider audience, and theres bound to be a lot more people to meet, but walking up to someone with a 'Helloooo….' , I would possibly end up with a ….ooooW!!

The dressing sense is a lot easier on the eyes ( as confirmed by an opthamologist!! ) , and for some mundane reason , after my latest med-checkup ( during which it was confirmed that I am mentally absent and phsically present) another i-doc advised me to marry someone without glasses.

So dear bangaloreans, pay no attention to my furtive glances … ( i blame it on eyestrain!!!! ) , and of course, i'm just looking for a pretty young lass without glasses !

Rx: Marry someone without glasses.

Now who said anything about marriage? Like i said, im just a harmless social browser! So do flock around! A little flirting around never hurt anyone , besides, its good for the ego. Ahh, the colours, the designs, the presentation, the cuisine! mmmmmmmm….

Till then, Eyeeees Front!

Advice for the day: quoting Jerry Seinfeld (though not entirely in context) – looking at cleavage is like looking at the Sun!! You dont stare at it! You get a sense and then you look away!!!

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I I’M Bangalored – A tale of two cities!

November 8, 2005

mmm Mani, mmm Mani , mmmmmmm Mani!

Act 1, Scene 1.
A guy was relaxing in his cubicle, one evening, when the Man beckoned for him to proceed towards the open door. He proceeded towards the con-ference room, like a sheep to the slaughter not doubting the gravity of the situation.

'You have been noticed around here.. ( All xx kilos of you) .. We have decided .. to bangalore you .. '

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Flashback.
A guy walks into an office, shakes hands with the boss and tells him he wants out.
The boss, looks up in bewilderment and chuckles silently. As the guy leaves the room , he hears a distinct roar in the background…
hahahahahahahahah What ? him ? Trivandrum ? Bangalore? aaaahhahahahahahaah….

Back to the present, the guy regains consciousness after a few seconds and stares at the man. Using soft skills, he proceeds to paraphrase what he thought he just heard.
If I heard you right, i beleive that I have been laid off because my jobs has been moved to india?

The Guy, also known as Chintamoney , reclined readily in his swivel chair . Only Chinta, No money as he was called, he was well known for his wit and his ever dwindling bank balance.
He couldn't figure out what it was about his fantabulous character that made him the scapegoat for all kinds of odd jobs around the office. Go get the knife, go fix the printer … but he never complained. A simpleton , he was amazed by the complexities of simple day to day gadgets like the Sony PSP and the effect it had on unsuspecting souls with a little extra cash to spend. Drawn into bad company by Sony (C) , he threw away his lifetime savings and purchased enough PSP to keep him happy for a while. Thinking it would be the solution to all lifes problems, he invested heavily in technology, the technology he had promised to uphold.

A week later, the new member of the family arrived. It was white in colour , with a brilliant black scar over the front. Chimo was captivated by its beauty and swore never to let it out of his sight again. This was his sorcerers stone. It gave him the power to browse the net wirelessly and to view photos/videos and listen to music anytime anywhere. Nothing could interfere with his destiny, nothing , nothing, nothing other than the fact that bus to bangalore would leave with ot without his presence .

With various Chinta's crossing his mind, he wondered how he would take his family with him . After all, a boy of 23 would not be expected to carry around the emotional baggage of a laptop,a jukebox, and a PSP all at the same time? There's polygadgetry for you! Married to multiple gadgets! Theres a good reason why this is banned in modern society. But no. chintamoney was traditional. He loved all gadgets equally. After all, in his eyes, all gadgets are created equal, its the designers that screw them up.

Chinta packs all the necessery files and folders an attaches them to the suitcase. He puts the payload in a packet on the set of wires connecting Tvm to Blr and gets on himself. This cabin turned out to be air conditioned!
On his way to bangalore, he decides to make note of his great journey, the day he left trivandrum , to make it big for himself in the big city…

——————————-live journal————————————–
Sunday, a day of infamy.

Bangalore Ahoy!
The Names Mani. International Chinta illatha cash illatha pani illatha project code illatha PC illatha Mani.
Employee number 3060333931
Favorite numner: 420 55 111 91 02 06 05 3014 43 00000 213

I got on to a bus said Maadi Wala! Having heard great things about this Maadi , i got on boldly. Bangalore was all about Enjoy Maadi. So I was not going to be left out! No Siree. Not me
Not ICICI PIPPCIPCI Mani. I was got off the bus at the hub of the city. More so, i saw most of the people getting off there. I figured this had something to do with the Maadi. I was no more a
regular wala, for that instant, i was a Maadi Wala! Even my mobile phone agreed with me , those two very words appeared on the screen and everything else faded out of sight.

I had to meet some eminent personalities incuding the Master Bachelor of Asia, the great Johnny Kurian. Johnny kurian, not to be confused with Johnny Bravo , is the more intellectual of the lot. He beleives that people will do anything for the right amount of money. So he decided to learn how to earn money by making people do mundane tasks. He was going to be a ….. ….. ….. a Manager.

For the ladies in the house, Johnny Kurian can be found at

Johnny Kurian
No. 9, Private Drive
Lethargic Avenue

He demonstrated the power of a brand name. To Chinta, he was just another Cosmo Spacely wannabe. After all that would be a dream job, "Jetson!! You're Fired!!!!" . But no. Not this manager. He had other plans. With the cloak of manliness handed down to him from a certain Professor Dumhelldoor , he put it on , and withing an instant , was surrounded by all the female staff of Indie Joes were on him. Now Chintamoneys eyes lit up. He had seen similar cloaks of manliness on the roadside, that too for quite a bargain! He could pickup one of them and he would also be a 'Chick magnet'! The plan was infallable! He was on a mission.

Chintamoney proceeded to get himeself a one of a kind cloak of manliness that captured glances of many ladies and got him noticed. No where could he escape the knowing looks of the haute crowd of Bangalore . He was Maadi. No Chinta, Only Maadi. The mystery behing his sudden instant sex appeal can be attributed to one thing. Well actually two things. Brand power and a lack of a spell check feature in the fashion industry.

Here we see the Cloak of manliness handed down from generation to generation of street vendors.

Instant Sex appeal guaranteed , or your money back!

As the saying goes,

Sony PSP 12,500 rupees
Ipod Nano 10,500 rupees
Acer Ferrari 99,500 rupees

Instant sex appeal cloak of manliness – priceless

No bangaloreans were harmed during the production of this event. TTA